Lily’s iRules Contract, Written By Lily & Janell

Janell Burley Hofmann, January 07, 2019

Lily’s iRules Contract, Written By Lily – January 1, 2019

  1. Phone must have password. Mom & Dad must know it.
  2. If I see anything bad, say something about it.
  3. Always ask if I’m not sure if I should post.
  4. I can bring it to friends’ houses, soccer and sports if I need it.
  5. I can make calls and FaceTime people I know like friends and family.
  6. I can’t have it in my room when it’s time for bed.
  7. I can bring it to school, but it’s turned off unless a teacher says it’s ok or we’re allowed to have it out.
  8. Ask permission before getting apps or purchases.
  9. Turn off at 8pm on schools days. Exception if I have soccer until late.
  10. Turn off at 10pm on weekends.
  11. I can have school apps like Powerschool, Quizlet and if the teachers need us to have something.
  12. Post positive stuff and don’t be rude to anyone.
  13. No inappropriate pictures of people, places, etc.
  14. Remember to take in everything around me and to not always be head down.
  15. I can get Snapchat when parents say I’ve been doing good with my new phone.


Dearest Lily,

You know my expectations for who you are, and my deep respect for who you are becoming. That person knows herself, but builds her character. She does what’s right, but can ask for help. She’s smart, but always learning. She’s a team player, but strong enough to stand alone. Who you are matters in all places – walking the halls of school, battling on the soccer field, hanging on the couch with your siblings, as a guest in someone else’s house – and on the Internet.

I won’t plead with you to be perfect, only human. Which means you get to make choices and mistakes and decide how you want show up in the world. And the next day – the good part and the hard part – is that you get to practice it all over again. Remember, my dear one, the virtual world is actual and what happens there counts. If others don’t hold you to it, I will. I love you too much to not teach you what I know.

So my wish is that you choose to practice proud & humble, bold & true, on and away from the screen. And that this gift is a tool and point of connection, a symbol of my trust and a celebration of your growing up. It feels like we are just starting, but you have always been learning. You are ready.

Here are my rules to live by. I hope they grow right along with you.

  1. You must sleep when it’s time to sleep and eat when it’s time to eat. Screen free. Always.


  1. There will be things you have to do – study, solve, practice, prepare – with a full heart, mind and focus. If your screen is not an aid, it’s away.


  1. Your device is public space. It is a billboard outside of your school. A message to the world. A true group convo. Don’t say it, share it, like it or look it up if you don’t want all eyes on it.


  1. Here’s the thing about jerks – you are not one. Devices disappear if this should change.


  1. It may become harder to just breathe and be, sit with yourself and others. But you must. Do not give this up for anything.


  1. You are a child. A beginner. New. I am old and wise and on your side. I like it here. Use me up. Put me to work. You are not alone.


Love you. Always.



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